Family Matters

In a recent letter, I was asked who lives in my compound with me.  This is a complicated question to answer because different people have lived at my compound at different times in my first two months here.  Children have gone to attend schools in other villages.  Some children have come to stay at my compound in order to attend school here.  Various family members and their children will come to stay with my family for weeks until one day, with little warning, they will announce that they are returning home.  Even in the time between first writing this blog entry and revising it, one child left my compound to live with his father in the capital region and another aunt came to stay with her son.

To make the explanation of my host family even more complicated, the way Gambians relate to their extended family members follows a completely different system.  In a Gambian family, your father’s brothers are also your fathers.  Your mother’s sisters are also your mothers.  Your aunts are your father’s sisters only and your uncles are your mother’s brothers.  Any of your fathers’ or mothers’ children are your siblings.  But your uncles’ and aunts’ children are your cousins.  My village is full of people that I call my father because they are my dad’s brothers.  Their children are all my siblings (probably half the school).  Oh, and your brother’s wife?  Also your wife!  So, if your brother dies, you inherit his wife and her children.

So, I will attempt to answer the question by sharing the names of those currently and regularly in my compound.  I will also try to explain their relation to me.

Hamat (Bukary) Sallah:  My host-father, the owner of the compound, and a first-grade teacher at the school.  My father is the son of the village head, or alkaloo.

Kaddijatou (Bambi) Jallow:  My host-grandmother, the mother of my father.  Her husband died after my father was born, at which point she was bequeathed to his brother, Juka (the village head, or alkaloo).  So, while my father considers Ba Juka an adopted father, my grandmother is considered his second wife.

Fatoumata (Batoliay) Jallow: My host-mother, a cousin of my father.  Here, wives keep their maiden names.  She has been the dutiful first (and only) wife of my father since she was 18.

Alpha Sallah: My host-brother, the son of Fatoumata and Hamat.  Alpha is 19 and currently not in school.  He did not pass his Grade 9 exams and so my parents are considering sending him to a technical school.

Modika Sallah: My host-brother, the son of Fatoumata and Hamat.  Modika is 15 and in Grade 8.  He is a Student Councilor, a Scout, and a bright kid.

Njibou Sallah: My host-sister, the daughter of Fatoumata and Hamat.  Njibou is 12 and in Grade 6.

Kajata (Kaja) Sallah:  My host-sister, the daughter of Fatoumata and Hamat.  Kaja is 6 and does not yet attend school.

Sheik Sallah: My host-brother, the son of Fatoumata and Hamat.  Sheik just turned 4 and we celebrated his birthday (though that is not typically done in the Gambia) as a way for me to share an American tradition.

Lamin Sallah: My host-brother, the son of Fatoumata and Hamat.  Lamin is four months, sitting and gurgling away.

Amie Sallah: My host-aunt, the sister of my father and daughter of Bambi and Juka.  Amie was recently divorced by her husband and sought my father out to provide for her and her daughters.  Currently, three of her daughters are living at the compound, one daughter is living in the capital region, and her son lives with his father in the next village.

Fawura Ceesay: My host-cousin, the daughter of Aunt Amie.  Fawura is 6 and does not yet attend school.

Jaila Ceesay: My host-cousin, the daughter of Aunt Amie.  Jaila is 3 and does not yet attend school.  I am told this girl is the spitting image of her father and that she is just as hard-headed.

Kaddijatou Ceesay: My host-cousin, the daughter of Aunt Amie.  Kaddijatou is seven months, sitting up, and already eating rice from the food bowl.

Kaddijatou Sallah: My host-aunt, the sister of my father and daughter of Bambi and Juka.  Kaddijatou is a 3^rd grade teacher at a neighboring village.  She spends school days in that village and returns home on weekends.

Jabou Sallah:  My host-sister, the daughter of my father’s brother, and the ward of my Aunt Kaddijatou.  She attends the school that my aunt teaches at and stays in that village during the week.  She also returns to our compound every weekend.  Jabou is 9 and in Grade 3.

Rokey Jallow: My host-cousin, the daughter of Kumbaie (my father’s sister living in another village).  Rokey lives with us to attend Grade 8 at the school.  This girl is extremely hard-working and could probably run the compound herself.